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Sunday, September 12, 2010

Love letters in text form

I just got through transferring all my old saved texts from Matt from my phone to the computer. Have I forgotten how stinkin' romantic that boy is or what? Not really, because he still sends amazing love letters that make my heart melt, but those ones are in Spanish, therefore requiring a lot of time and google translate, which doesn't always make complete sense. I'm just loving the flashbacks of how i felt the first time I recieved these messages, how amazing and full of love we both felt. Can I just post one example of one he sent me 2 months before he left on his mission:
December 19, 2009- I love you Kaylie so much! Its so crazy the way I feel about you. I just want to be with you so much you’re the only person I want to spend forever with and live happily ever after with and I want us to work out anything that comes our way. I’m sorry that I have caused us problems, and it may seem like I’m not sure of stuff but there is one thing im sure of, and that is that I love you so much Kaylie, no matter what may ever happen. I believe that when the time is right that the lord will let me know that you’re my sweetheart for life, but until then I think he wants me to forget those crazy strong feelings that I feel for you and devote myself solely to him. I actually think that is playing a big part in all this. Just know that I know I love you so much. You are supreme. I couldn’t ask for anything better then you my love please just know that I love you Kaylie. I want you to be the happiest girl ever.
Now to explain, we had been having lots of random stupid fights. And matt would sometimes say scary stuff like," I'm just not sure about things. I know I love you, but maybe I'm not in complete love with you. something feels different..." And I would have panic attacks about him not loving me anymore. And then one night he sends me this. Its like he had some sort of comfort come over him and it also somehow let him know Exactly the right thing to say to make me feel better. These wise words have helped me get through these seven months so far without him. And I know they will continue to bring me comfort over the next 17 months until he comes home. I KNOW that he loves me. I KNOW that I love him. And I also know that he does need to devote himself completely to the Lords work, and that I am not, nor should I be, his highest priority. And I am 100% okay with that :)

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