Drunk Driver

Last night we were hit by a drunk driver. My older sister was driving, my mom in the passengers seat, and me Lindsey and two year old Gage in the back seat. I feel so lucky that nobody was hurt. just some wicked whiplash. I know for a fact we were being watched over. If the timing had been any different, at least some of us would have been seriously injured. He came speeding up behind us, didn't even try to hit the breaks. slammed into the back of the car and then his car spun up through a tree and onto the sidewalk, as a big case of beer flew out of his car. Are you kidding me? Please, please, please don't EVER drink and drive. There are way too many stories of people being killed this way. I'm lucky I wasn't hurt. I don't know what I would do if any one of us had been hurt. Especially little baby boy. Thank you Heavenly Father for watching over us and keeping us safe.

Red Lipstick

I bought red lipstick today. Matt doesn't like lipstick. For five years I haven't worn lipstick. But I got some today. Because Matt isn't here to disapprove.
I wish he was.
I wish I didn't have to wait weeks between hearing from him. I wish I could go ahead and get mad at him when his letter finally comes and it's not what I needed to hear. I wish I could get a text saying goodnight and I love you. It's hard to sleep without those. I haven't gotten to sleep very easily for 5 months now.
And I wish I could write about something else! It's not fair that I am thinking of him, missing him, all day, every day. Endlessly.

Bummer

So I got my tonsils out yesterday. Not the most drastic of surgeries, but still, I wish Matt was here :( I know if he was he would be taking good care of me, getting me whatever I need/want, rubbing my back, playing with my hair, distracting me. Sigh. I mean, I'll be fine. My mom is doing fine taking care of me, but its just not the same. Matt can ALWAYS make me feel better in a way that nobody else can. Oh well, no use being sad about it. On a happier note, Matt has been out for 3 months now! It's going by fairly quickly, this week being the exception. And I've heard from other girls that after the 3 month mark, times speeds up even more. Also, this week is our 3 year anniversary! I've got to send a package....I have a scrapbook thing, and a CTR ring, and tape recording to send him. I need to make him some cd's he asked for, and I also want to make some sort of treat to send with it. I wanted to get this all sent last week so he would get it in time. But I have no money with which to send it. I'd better get that out tomorrow. except I need to buy blank cd's. Which is where having no money becomes an issue. Maybe my mom will help me out.

Mothers Day

This weekend was kind of hard for me, as it is every year. May 9th is my dads birthday, and May 8th is the anniversary of his death. So during this Mothers day, while I was thinking about my mom and how much I love and appreciate and look up to her, I've also been missing my daddy. I can't help but think how different our lives would be if he was still here. I'm missing the life I never got a chance to have, because his was cut short. And just missing him in general. I wish I had been older, so I would have had a chance to get to know him better. Maybe it's better that I didn't. I never really knew the bad side, the drug addict side of my dad. I was just always daddy's little princess, and I always looked up to him. Obviously I still have those memories of the bad times, ten years old is old enough to figure out what was really going on. But the majority of my memories are good ones, and I am grateful for that.
In other news, Happy Mothers Day to my sweet mom! I love her with all my heart, and appreciate all that she does for me. She is my best friend, and I could not imagine life without her. Also Happy mothers day to my amazing sister. She has the cutest stinkin' kids I have ever met in my entire life, and she is such a good cute little mommy. I look up to her in lots of ways.
In other other news, I got to talk to Matt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't thank his mom enough for including me in her phone call. The whole family got in on a conference call, so it was his mom and dad and all three brothers and their wives and me. It was definitely different from what I'm used to. With my brothers, we always just had the one phone line, and everyone would take turns just talking to them alone. But yeah, so with Matt's family we were all on the line together. Which worked out fine, if anyone had something to say they just said it, and we all got to hear Matt's answer. He sounds like he is doing so good! He has a baptism set up already, and he has only been there for two weeks! It sounds like his ward and his area is just doing wonderfully. And he is being fed amazing food every night, and he loves his companion, and he is doing so awesome at speaking the Spanish. I'm so so proud of him. And it was great to hear his voice. ah, I love him!

Love Him!

Okay its been a while. Lets see...I got a package with a tape recording in it for my birthday present! That was super amazing. I have been listening to it every night. Oh and today I just found out that it has more on the other side, so thats exciting :) How did I find out about the flip side? Oh, Matt just told me during his PHONE CALL from the airport! Totally unexpected. He pretty much scolded me before saying he doesn't see why I would care when his flight is, that there is no way he will be calling me, it would be against the rules, blah blah blah. I was actually quite upset after that letter. But then HE CALLED! I really talked to him! It was kinda funny. I was laying in bed, sleeping, when my phone started vibrating and woke me up, I didn't recognize the number but for some reason I answered anyway. So I'm all sleepily like, Hello? And I'm kinda mad that this person woke me up. Then I hear, "Hello, Kaylie?" and I'm like ".....Yeah?" "Did I wake you up?" And thats when I realized, MATT! Honey! HI! I think I literally squealed, haha. He just started laughing at me. Oh my gosh he is sooo adorable! He told me he loved me lots of times. He said he thinks of me a milllion times a day. He said it was crazy being out of the MTC, seeing guys with long hair, and girls in tank tops. He saw one guy with a mohawk while he was talking to me, haha he says, "I feel like a rebel just looking at it" Out of the MTC bubble. He bore his testimony of prayer and building a relationship with our Heavenly Father, and reading the scriptures. He got a commitment out of me to do that every night. He has such a powerful spirit about him. Even through the phone, it really touched me. I'm honestly amazed. So yeah, thats my latest news. And I get to talk to him again on Mothers Day! Can't wait :)

No Worries

I got my letter today, but not before I sent one out totally guilt tripping him about not getting a letter on my birthday week. Whoops :/ Ha I guess I need to learn patience when it comes to getting letters. It was a big, fat, super sweet letter too. Ah I'm in love! Another poor Elder in Matt's district got Dear Johned, and I think it shook Matt up a bit. This guy was totally engaged, with a wedding date set and everything! Poor guy. But I told Matt that he NEVER needs to worry about that with us. I am totally and completely in love, forever :) I haven't had a doubt in my mind about marrying Matthew since day one. I'm soo happy right now! Matt also said that he has a surprise birthday present set up for me, and he was super excited about it, and that he just knows I am going to love it. This makes me so very curious...I wasn't expecting any sort of present from him at all. What could it be?

Birthday Week

I'm nineteen years old! Crazy stuff. It was a really good day. I was really bummed at first, because I had to work. But after I was up there, the boy I was going to be watching canceled, so I got to go home! So I got home, and frosted Easter sugar cookies with my sisters. Then we went out to lunch/ shopping at Tae Pan and Hobby Lobby. There are so many cute things at these places to decorate your house! I cannot wait until I can seriously be shopping for that stuff for OUR home. Then that night my mom took us out to a movie. We saw The Last Song. I really liked the movie, but I really want to read the book. I loved the story line, but Miley Cyrus bugs me, so that put a damper on the movie. Ugh it was a sad one tho. Definitely a tear jerker. Then we got dinner at Red Robin. Yumm :) And today, Sunday, I got my birthday dinner combined with Easter dinner. My mom gave me this learn Spanish computer program, basically just like Rosetta Stone. I'm so excited! I wanted to learn Spanish way bad while Matt is gone, so we can speak it together in our home :) Basically, I love my family. They do so much to make me feel special and loved, and I know they care about me. Especially my mom. She is such a sweetheart, I know she tries so hard to give me the world and make me happy. I love her so much, I don't know what I'd do without her. The Big Bummer of everything tho, is that I didn't get a letter this week :( I'm missing Matt so so much! I'm missing the whole, presents and a nice date and a birthday kiss and having him there hanging out with my family, holding my hand. And gosh darn it I needed to hear from him this week! I guess I sorta did tho...He left me three letters in envelopes the night he left. they said, Do not open until your birthday, Do not open til Anniversary, Do not open til Christmas. So I opened my birthday one. I'll post it up here:
Dear Kaylie,
Happy Birthday to the sweetest of girls who ever existed. Now you might think its silly to write you letters to you beforehand when I'll send you occasion cards while on my mission, but the difference is that I can't feel homesick about talking about stuff when I write them now :) Lets do a recap of all our birthdays together. I think by far your lamest birthday with me was #15 because I didn't even really know about it. Thats ok I don't feel too guilty about that one. The next one, #16 was definitely a step up. I remember it was just after you cut your hair short and it looked so good. Gosh now that I think back, you were thee best friend ever! I was so excited everytime I got to see you :) I can't really remember what we did but i do remember that I got you that thin long sleeved shirt thing. Not my best effort, but hey! I was still a beginner. #17 was probably my next lamest. I downloaded two cds off itunes and put them on cds for you. Though I did think that personalized kids songs cd was hilarious :) hahahaha:) I really think that #18 was my shining moment. Honestly and a little shamefully i cannot remember what I got you. I just remember what we did and how amazing that whole day felt :) I tried extra hard all day to be really nice and sweet. I remember how we went to Goodwood but it was a really long wait so i decided to fill up on Frogurt. Haha and since that wasn't enough, I decided to order a Giant plate of nachos as an appitizer. haha by the time we both got our food that we ordered we were so stuffed. haha pretty smart on my part. So we let our stomachs settle a little bit. Then we parked ourselves at Lonepeak to go sledding. haha man that was some great ice to slide and fall on haha. without a doubt teh best part was our special little dance. You looked so gorgeous in your peacoat :) That dance party was all kind of an on-the-spot decision but it was amazing. I hope your day today is just as special. I hope you enjoy Alice in Wonderland. I love you so much forever and always :) Mmmmmwaa!
Love,
Matt

Okay, so I appreciate that, but I hope he didn't think that would count as a letter for my birthday week! It's super sweet that he does remember all of that tho. I love that we have that many years together to recall! And there is an eternity of more still to come! He just has to miss these two. I can deal with that. Okay now that I vented I am feeling much much better. And I'm glad I typed that letter out. It made me appreciate it more. Mm I love him so much!